When I think about love...
(I think about you)
Am I the only one who remembers the duet between Elton John and PM Dawn, When I Think About Love (I Think About You)? (Or am I the only one who has ever even heard of it? 🤣🤣🤣)
Anyhow, the song came to me last week, out of nowhere yet wholly appropriately so when I was walking and listening to our soundtrack…I was thinking about you all and something I wrote last time I was here:
In fact I wish each of you could know the plot lines that I think of when I hear your song. And maybe someday I’ll tell you.
But for now I can easily summarize for you: it’s all the good things.
As I kept walking and listening and thought about you even more, that old song title flipped…it was more like “when I think about you, I think about love.”
With the election shenanigans and all the related hyper-negative talk surrounding us, with all of the fighting, the polarization, etc. etc. etc., it would be easy to get sucked into the sociopolitical sewer pipe and swept into a sea of steaming, stinking sewage. I am swimming against the current today, focusing on love. And so, in that spirit, I’m going to share a little of it…in the order the songs appeared when I played the playlist on random, here’s what I think about (in part anyway) when I think about you:
Against The Wind. This song was a perfect submission from you, I think. It totally captures your midwestern sensibility and your easy breezy upbeat acceptance of life as it is—at least that’s how I remember you, at least 15 years since we last saw each other. I’ll always appreciate your unique ability to have a positive and attitude no matter the conditions, staying “jazzed” up in the most unjazziest of circumstances. (I also always will be irritated with you for calling me when I was on vacation sitting on a beach, so you could give your two-weeks’ notice because you had to get the “I’m outta here” clock ticking right away, but that’s a whole other story.)
Rise. I barely remember life without you in it, and you’ve always been one of my biggest cheerleaders, even in the “olden days” when I was a one-woman losing team. 🤦🏼♀️ To say that our friendship has flourished over the last four decades would be a massive understatement. We’d go months (years?) without speaking (maybe an occasional letter?) and would see each other randomly/sporadically (without rhyme or reason), but eventually we settled into a more regular rhythm, thank God. I treasure every moment we are together and I love your family as my own. Ours is one of those divine friendships that defies every law of friendship physics. Lucky me.
Little Green Bag. You support your people when they need you, regardless of how it impacts you, regardless of anything. Your tenacity, honesty, commitment, perspective, never-ending generosity, and patience seem daunting to me, but to you, it’s a perfectly natural and easy mix—what a great way to be. Besides that, I know you’re always in our corner, and I love having you there.
American Pie. I met you through friends of friends who are no longer friends of mine…yet our connection has persisted. This leads me to the easy conclusion that you are one of those people who is meant to be in my life, and I take that seriously. I appreciate your honesty, compassion, generosity, and all the other values you embody. I love your commitment to your family, in particular your devotion to your sisters and the generations who came before, and while you are nice through and through, you abide no bullshit, and I totally respect that. We’re perpetually overdue for a get together, but whenever finally we do, it never fails to right the ship. (Let’s pick a date.)
Steady On. This title is a fantastic selection—it’s not only a great song, it is also the perfect companion piece to our friendship. It’s been all over the map for over 30 years, but it’s always been on the map…and the music of Shawn Colvin is intertwined in its roots. While there are very few people in life who hold a special place in your heart no matter what, with a kind of love that’s steady on, you are one of the few who hold that place in mine…steady on.
Waiting on an Angel. Blood is thicker than water, thicker than molasses on a cold morning—we will always have each other’s backs, no doubt about it. If we had a dollar for every laugh we had together…at least we’re rich in love. There’s great comfort in that, always. Nobody puts baby in the corner and in my life, you’ll always have a place on center stage. I’ll always be cheering for you. Now go have a whiskey for your papa.
Cloudy Day. Thanks also to friends of friends (though in this case they still are friends) I have you. You are focused and persistent, hard and soft, don’t give a shit what other people think yet care so much about other people. You are a great blend of all the important things, and even though we don’t see each other often, I know I can count on a good convo over a good beer when we do. Sometimes knowing we can count on each other is all we need.
The American Dream is Killing Me. There aren’t enough letters in the alphabet, words in the dictionary, hours in a day, or days in a lifetime to allow me to adequately communicate what I think about when I think of you. Fortunately, I think you already know. This was an interesting pick from you, but since these turbulent sociopolitical times throw that giant loving heart of yours out of balance, I know why you chose it. What I don’t know, however, is why you chose me. But every day I thank God you did.
Hope the High Road. (I love this song so much. Thank you for “giving” it to me.) We’re probably an unlikely friend pairing, but we’re connected on some higher level. Or is it a deeper level? Both? I’m grateful that we tend that connection, albeit in fits and starts. You’ll always hold a special place in my heart for the support you didn’t even know you were providing me back when we met. That you’re one of the good guys cements your place there. Some connections need no explanation. Which is fine because an explanation might ruin the magic anyway.
Good Vibrations. While it was a rocky start, when you so were so dismissive of my introduction and “welcome to (the company)” at that check-in desk at whatever hotel wherever it was, for some big corporate event, the turnaround was quick, clearly meant to be. We put that awkward start in the rearview and now some 20 years later here we still are…and I will never be without the most important advice you gave me: just be happy, dammit.
Give Me One Reason. As part of the hockey crew that embraced me as the #1 fan out of the gate, I’m forever grateful for your open arms and open heart. You’re always quick to offer a smile or a knowing look of solidarity, you know exactly which one to offer when, and not one smile or smirk is lost on me. Your giant heart and generous spirit are a breath of fresh air whenever you’re in the room.
Dakota. Well…we went to high school together, and I can’t say we were friends then…nor were we enemies…we just were plain old classmates, I guess. And then at some point relatively recently we connected on Facebook, bridging a decades-long gap, and I’ve come to truly appreciate your always-thoughtful engagement. You’re retiring soon (good for you!) and I’m looking forward to having a beer to celebrate and catch up on the last 40 years—plus I owe you one! (And this is a great song that I hadn’t heard before, so thanks!)
Nothing More. You present me with my greatest challenges, my highest highs, and my lowest lows. You’ve been with me literally every second of my life, as I have been with you of yours…try though I may, I can’t escape you. You drive me crazy, with your weird “things,” but I also know your heart is always in the right place. I also suspect that you’re not as misunderstood and underappreciated as you often think. My unsolicited advice—you’re doing just fine, and you’ll be ok.
This is the Day. Another high school classmate. Not a friend per se, but I’d characterize our relationship then as friendly, right? I mean, when you are one of a very small group of public-school kids who think taking high school Latin is a good idea, you bond in a number of ways. We reconnected recently through The Pundit, and I am glad we did. I don’t really even know you now, but I picture your 18-year old smile, and it makes me smile. Plus, whenever we have an exchange sparked by something you read here, it makes my day.
Vienna. We met in the in between years of the in between years (after college but before “shit got real”) through my sister. There was just something that clicked between us. We shared a lot of happy, funny, fun times in those days…many more than I can remember before life took us in different directions, because that’s what life does sometimes. And while I’m so sorry that an extreme tragedy in your life is what brought us back together, I’m grateful for your regular and steady presence in my life. I appreciate your unique ability to take it all at once, the good, the bad, the ugly, the preposterous, the amusing…all of it, honestly. Sometimes with grace, other times with frustration, and other times still with lots of other things…but always with humor and love. I love laughing with you. (And the copious amounts of wine that accompany it are a bonus.)
How Do I Say Goodbye. You’re another one from that open-armed hockey crew, and I’ll always appreciate the warm friendly embrace you gave me from the get, no questions asked. I had never heard this song before, and when I was out walking the other day, this lyric hit me: “You gave me my name and the color of your eyes, I see your face when I look at mine.” It triggered a temporary meltdown moment for me, thinking of my dad, some 10 years after he died. But in that same space, I suspected something—that you shared that song because you feel it deeply on so many levels, which is exactly how you live. You live so deeply and on so many levels, plus you are quick to share joy (and bourbon), and your generosity is unmatched.
Smalltown Boy. It was my first job out of college, and I was replacing Jenny, who everyone loved…but somehow we not only made it work, we had lots of fun. Like at the Depeachy Mode concert, the one you bought the tickets for over the styrophone. (HA!) Or doing those early year AIDS walks, back when the disease was rampant, the impacts immediate, and thus the cause especially poignant. And even though back then there were no cellphones or email or any modern convenience to help us stay connected, here we are…still connected. Some friendships don’t need technological underpinnings to stay strong. Phew.
Bigmouth Strikes Again. Without The Smiths, there’d be no us. Their music offers irrefutable proof that music is indeed the strongest connective tissue there is. It can build bridges between places and spaces and people that seem best left alone. Our friendship has always meant the world to me—whether it’s been on the front burner, the back burner, or looking like a dumpster fire. No matter where we are or where we stand, I know we’ll always find our way back together, which is one of life’s great comforts. And when we do, it’s always like no time has passed…we laugh our assess off, most often without even exchanging a single word. There’s nothing better than that.
Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes. We live on different latitudes (I checked) and different longitudes, and we met each other on different ones still. Our attitudes are different, but our sensibilities the same. I appreciate your giant open heart, your sense of humor, your appreciation of happy hour, your love of great music, and your finely tuned BS meter. It would have been easy for us to go through life without ever meeting; thank God we didn’t have to.
If you submitted a song, you know which one is yours, and now you know what I think (in part) when I listen and think about you. Maybe some of you can guess who submitted some of these songs…though I’ll never tell. But I will tell you which one was mine. Nothing More. I don’t have a top-secret conjoined twin 🤣
If you haven’t yet, you still can submit your one song to me, anytime. Either way, it’s a great listen:
And now onto some of my other thoughts.
Speaking of music…you know I love a good cover…and I love Mt. Joy…so this one is a treat, a bit of an anthem to cognitive dissonance, as it were, and it seems especially appropriate in today’s times.
Speaking of time…yesterday I noticed how dark it was at 6pm, which reminded me that this weekend we “fall back.” So in addition to being plunged into the depth of darkness well before dinner is even on the table for a few months, we’ll also have to contend with the disproportionate disorientation that comes with having to deal with an extra hour. Bonus: use that free time however you see fit on Sunday. (Also, don’t forget to get to check the batteries of your smoke alarms. If they have the sealed battery, make sure the unit doesn’t need to be replaced. Same for carbon monoxide detectors. And do your elderly neighbors or relatives a solid and check theirs too. Fire moves fast and these alarms will get you moving (hopefully faster).)
Speaking of time flying by, today is Halloween. Wasn’t it just 4th of July? On Saturday we went to a local jack-o-lantern stroll, Night of a Thousand Faces, to get in the spirit. It was very cool. Now we’re trying to set the over-under for how many trick or treaters we’ll get tonight. I’m thinking 15 and taking the under. If I have to get up, fake smile, and say “Great costume…help yourself…enjoy…” more than 15 times…well, Boo. Plus the world is so scary who needs Halloween???
Five of 1000 faces. Speaking of the scary world…I’m anxiously petrified about the upcoming election. It’s kind of like Sophie’s Choice except—let’s face it—you really like one kid more than the other. I’m not going to go into too much detail here because I’m kind of flummoxed. But how can someone at a Trump rally call Puerto Rico a floating island of garbage and that’s funny…but when Mr. Irrelevant Joe Biden calls Trump supporters garbage in response, it’s stirring up a civil war, v2? I’m tired of all the aggressive and threatening language…and I’m scared of the election outcome, either way, just differently.
The timing of Jeff Bezos’ decision not to endorse a candidate relative to his rationale for such decision doesn’t add up…if the practice creates bias, why not implement/announce the change when you bought the paper??? You can’t retrofit an explanation to fit the circumstances, try though you may.
I’m a little bit alarmed with LinkedIn seeing more and more political posts…as someone relying on LinkedIn (in part) to help me find a job, it’s disheartening (on so many levels). Plus what bias of mine doesn’t allow me to see any political content that I agree with? It’s like I have an anti-familiarity anti-confirmation bias, if that even is a thing. 🤷🏼♀️ Or are only certain political agendas being promoted, practically and algorothmically?
Change of pace…to pleasant things, like the unseasonably warm weather we’ve had here in New England. On Saturday, it was *so* warm. I wanted to walk, but I also I wanted a change of scenery. I thought of driving to The Esker and walking it end to end (vs the usual neighborhood loop that takes me through part of it) but with water on the brain I checked the tide chart. It was 12:30 when I looked and low tide was 1:38—meaning I’d have the whole beach to walk on. I changed, got in the car, headed to Hull, and enjoyed 5 perfect miles under warm sun and bluebird skies. Heaven on earth.
Soul-resuscitating stroll… Speaking of walking, no matter what, I always get a couple thousand extra steps on Sunday, thanks to it being clean-sheet Sunday. Even though it’s only queen-sized, I manage to walk around that bed over and over and over (and over) to get the sheet, weighted blanked, regular blanket, and comforter just so…inflating my daily step count accordingly. 🤦🏼♀️
Speaking of the gorgeous weather, I stole another Summerfall day yesterday, getting in a great walk wearing tshirt and shorts. It was trash day, and the garbage and recycle bins everywhere got me to wondering…if the trash is picked up on the same day every week, why does the time it is picked up vary so wildly? Same day, same route, same weather conditions…one day 9:30A, one day 6:30P. Hard to prepare accordingly for that.
Gratuitous fall foliage pic from yesterday’s walk. Speaking of garbage, I know I already talked about politics…but I need to loop back to this one. How can you not be incensed about the lack of reaction by the Trump camp to the hate speech at the MSG rally??? I can understand if you don’t like Kamala Harris…but I cannot understand how you can support a self-proclaimed wannabe dictator with a very sharp ax to grind. It’s worse than the plot of any horror movie: the person who is not the sharpest knife in the drawer is armed with the sharpest tool in the shed and goes on a murder spree without regard for anyone but himself; the crowd goes wild, cheering him on, blind to the fact that piles of loved ones lie dead in his wake. Bottom line: get out the vote.
And since I mentioned making the bed, I’ve been thinking about this…if I shower at night and it’s cold, I’ll go to bed with wet hair in a Turbie Twist. While I’m opposed to cosmetic surgery in general, I may have to rethink my stance. That thing yanks my forehead, eyebrows, eyelids, and cheeks way up…I swear every twist of the turbie takes a year off my life. Fortunately, you don’t have to see any of that. You’re welcome.
Speaking of “you’re welcome,” thank you for being here and spending part of your Friday Eve with me—I appreciate it so much.
My low gas (aka “need coffee”) light is flashing, so I best run.
Love you too.
You made me cry😭😂
Love the playlist and the thoughts on each contribution to it!