Last Friday I was so crabby that when a car stopped to let me out of my driveway it annoyed me so much (like disproportionately so)…on account of the fact that there was no need for it to stop—there wasn’t a car in sight and they easily could have kept going and just let me back out on my own rights after they passed by, thanks. Then I drove to the gym and spent the duration of the insanely ugly workout thinking about it. I was so bothered by help I didn’t need, but who cares? What was up with that attitude? In this world gone mad, what the hell is wrong with me for being a Crabby Appleton about a good deed because I didn’t think it was necessary? Life’s too short not to be happy, let alone be crabby about something nice! Fortunately here I am a week later in a very decidedly different and much happier place. It’s true…what a difference a day (or seven) makes!
So what’s got me feeling good this Friday? you ask. Here ya go:
I’ll start with the obvious: Winter Shutdown commences today, so no work (and all joy) until January 3rd. Yesterday afternoon I happily turned on my out-of-office auto-reply and then even more happily shut the Surface down, did a pirouette-ish kind of move, and left my home office in the rearview.
I began this week with a day off, the freebie I get for being a non-smoker, and I spent it shopping in the morning with mom. Then we picked up my sister from work, headed to lunch, and did some more shopping. It was such a great day that when I FaceTimed my mom on Tuesday morning she said she wished she “could do an exact repeat of yesterday today.” It’s a special kind of joy I get from time like this spent with my mom, and Monday was no exception.
The best walk of 2021 wasn’t my longest or fastest walk, and in fact it wasn’t even on a nice day…though it wasn’t nearly as cold as Matt Noyes had made it sound and the freezing rain didn’t start to fall until much after the walk’s conclusion…but anyway the best walk was this past Wednesday at Great Esker Park in Weymouth, and the thing that made it so great was who I was walking with, how our conversation filled me with energy and hope and all things happy, and how it reminded me of what is important in this world. Many years ago, say early 2013-ish, I went to a small local gym run by a guy named Tom and he (sometimes helped out by his dad, brother, and some friends) led me through some kick-ass and ass-kicking workouts. I loved that gym so much, for the community it gave me at a time when my life really needed structure and support, and also for the fact that it helped me accomplish a feat that I had never accomplished before and have not accomplished since—doing a legit pull-up. (In fact I think I was able to do two.) Tom couldn’t make the gym work financially so it shut its doors and we went our separate ways. I’m not exactly sure how we managed to stay connected since then (my guess is it started with Facebook), but we have. Very on the fringe, very infrequent, though always a deep and meaningful connection. We’ve been talking more of late—I subscribe to what he writes, he to what I write, and we occasionally go back and forth in response to one another. So when Tom recently mentioned being back to living in Weymouth and suggested, knowing that I’m a big fan of walking, that maybe we could meet for a walk one day, I did not hesitate with a “yes” and we quickly booked it for 12/22. I won’t bore you with any more detail but I will say this: 1) Work to develop friendships with people in other generations. Tom is 38 and I appreciate the balance of earned and learned wisdom and hopeful energy he brings to our discussions. 2) Invest in the relationships that mean something to you. Our 60-minute walk through a hilly Great Esker Park went by in a blink. I was fully present in every step, fully present in the conversation, slightly winded at times…and the views didn’t hurt. Spending an hour walking and talking with someone I know but not that well but also someone who I feel a very strong connection with (if that makes sense) gave my brain and soul a certain refresh that maybe I didn’t “need” but I certainly benefited from. We had one kind of relationship in the gym, it’s developed differently albeit virtually since then…but it was so great to see him and seemed perfectly natural to share a big hug the moment I saw his smile. Friendships are about feelings and not frequency. I’m happy that this is how I was reminded of that valuable lesson. Talking to someone you haven’t talked to in a long time also is a good way to revisit your thinking, to reflect on what matters, to articulate what’s important, and to remind yourself of some important parts/lessons of the journey so far. I hope Tom and I can make our walking talks a regular occurrence, if not a frequent one. And if not then I’ll simply hope we bump into one another at Shaw’s or something now that he is living nearby.
I’ve been dosing pretty hard on holiday cheer, and have watched Love Actually, Home Alone, and The Holiday. Still need to watch a few more (Elf! Christmas Vacation!), but am feeling fully festive. And I did a lot of social media bonding over the Love Actually viewing too, a reminder that social media isn’t *all* bad.
Christmas for my family usually ramps up with the Holiday Pops and this year was no exception. Last night we loaded up the Armada and my brother-in-law Mike got the lot of us to our got-to pre-show dinner spot (Five Horses Tavern) on time and found a street parking space big enough for that beast of a car mere steps away from the restaurants’s front door. We had a great meal as we always do (we love how attentive they are about food allergies and the cornbread is to die for) and made it to our seats with enough time to spare that we could get up and run back down for a quick drink before the show. TBH we were all a little bit sad knowing there wasn’t going to be a singalong. One of the best parts of the show is that that is that even though the “kids” are grown up now, they still sing along. We all do. But our “sadness” was short lived because the program was fantastic. A couple New Mexican Christmas songs, an emotional reading of A Soldier’s Carol, and a few excerpts from Duke Ellington’s Nutcracker Suite really stood out, and of course they did some favorite can’t-miss numbers as well. To say we had a time for ourselves would be a massive understatement. But what a time we had!
Christmas Eve Dinner. As of yesterday, I had everything picked up except for the rib roast, which I need to go out and pick up soon…so if you’re the praying type, pray for me. 🤣 I love hosting this night, love having a house full of my favorite people, and have a good system for getting everything cooked and on the table, even though it always kinda stresses me out a little too. I can’t help it. But the potatoes for the Potatoes Byron will be baking as soon as I get back from the store, my strategy is written out, and if I can adhere to the fairly fixed (rigid, some might say) schedule, I’ll be all in on the fun from the time the cheese tray is served until the door closes behind the last guests leaving.
And the shortest day has passed so the days are getting longer! Pool opening May 17th!
Merry Christmas Eve. Thanks for being here, and I’ll be back on Monday with the final post of 2021. Love you too.
(And, since the best Christmas Eve song ever is finally (!!!) on Spotify, I’m happy to share it with you.)